Jimmie Dale Gilmore's Eyes

No doubt you remember Jimmie Dale Gilmore for his touching portrayal of the touchy blind panhandler on TV's "Gilmore Girls".  As the theme song goes, "He's mos'cocious, and he knows just what it takes to make the girls blush!" Didja know that Redd Kross was inspired to cover songs from TV shows after hearing the Adverts' version of "Jimmie Gilmore's Eyes"?

Jimmie was born in Flatland, and formed the country's first band The Flatlanders with his pals Joe Ely and Butch Hancock. While on tour in the Ukraine, they recorded their legendary Odessa tape over an old Bee Gees cassette. Unfortunately, the tape sounded as flat as an armadillo on an Amarillo highway. 

(Artist's depiction of a Flatland execution)

It was issued in Flatland (on vinyl and CD) as Odessean Auricle. The title was a translation error. A forgivable mistake in most of the world -- after all, The Zombies couldn't spell either! However, people in Flatland are deeply mainly concerned with surface appearances. They were outraged, and called for the execution of the Flatlandish translator. The disgraced translator faked her own death, which was reported in state-run media as a bizarre gardening accident.

The band members were distraught. They narrowly escaped Flatland by going their separate ways. Jimmie turned left, Butch went right. Joe Ely took a diagonal path, a radical move admired by The Clash and other punk rockers. Eventually, each former Flatlander became a well-rounded solo artist. 

(rejected art for Odessean Auricle) 

As a songwriter, Jimmie is famous for the theme from "Dallas", "Tonight I Think I'm Gonna Go Downtown", and "Pakko Päästä Kaupunkiin" (a  Flatlanders tune he wrote back in the USSR).

In July 2021, The Flatlanders released a new album, Treasure Of Love. American outrage over COVID restrictions inspired the trio to write songs about what government repression is really like. Although citizens are free to roam the breadth and width of Flatland, it is an oppressive environment that lacks depth. "They're a bunch of squares," historian Edwin "Abbott" Abbott said flatly, and he has a point.

Stinky (our field correspondent from the fourth dimension) was inspired by all of this inspiration, and he has compiled a Homemade Album called The Best Of Jimmie Dale Gilmore. (Disclaimer: Stinky is responsible for all of the alt-country music but none of the "alternative facts" in today's post. Treasure Of Love is a real new Flatlanders album: click here to buy it!)